After the last debacle in a $300 tournament, I'm hoping to last more than 2 hands and not stand in line for 2 hours.
As I walk into the Venetian, I am greeted by another damn line. This one is small and I get bought into the tourney in about 5 minutes and only miss a few hands.
After a moment of searching, I find my seat at 18 and get dealt my first hand. I look down at queens. Not this shit again. After raising, I get a call from the old guy to my left and the flops falls 2 3 9. Wonderful. Just wonderful. (I'm slowly turning into Allen Kessler. I go into a hand thinking that there's no chance I'm going to win it).
I bet out and he folds. Whew!! Good start.
Table 18 seat 8
12K in starting chips. 40 minute levels.
Table draw:
Seat 1: a crusty old seaman with a bushy mustache from Reno. He's wearing a Peppermill hat and he looks like he's had a hard life on the high seas.
Seat 2: a younger white guy who looks like he just came from the club. He's got on way oversized sunglasses and he's sucking on one of those fake cigarette things. From the other side of the table it looks like he's got a sharpie in his mouth.
Seat 3: an older white guy that looks like a turtle. I don't think it would be to hard for him to pull his head into his jacket to avoid giving off tells when he's made a reraise on someone.
Seat 4: rwg
Seat 5: rwg who I've played with before. I would bet that he's clinically insane. He really has no concept of poker, betting, gambling or math.
Seat 6: a younger white guy with one of the worst jr high school mustaches evar! The only reason I can see it is because he's pale and he has dark facial hair.
Seat 7: older white guy trying to channel Mickey Rourke from that Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man movie. He's got the bandana, 1 hoop earring in the left lobe, leather jacket, and cowboy boots. And he's horrid at poker.
Seat 8: jdn
Seat 9: the mad Greek. He's a little guy, about 60, and insane! Never saw a hand he didn't like and he went on a roller coaster in the first level. Going from 12K to 3K back up to 25K with blinds at 25/50. I need to get some of those chips.
Seat 10: rwg that kinda looks like Chris Moneymaker. In between hands he's highlighting documents.
LOL the kid in seat 2 is wearing reading glasses under his way oversized shades. Classy.
Holy moly! My table is outta control. In the first 3 levels we've lost 6 players. The blinds were at 100/200 and people were going apeshit. I love these tournaments.
I was pretty card dead through the last two levels, levels 2 and 3... So I didn't see any of the bust out chips. Clinically insane guy got most of the chips and he's sitting on a 50K stack.
I got 10,750 at break.
Wow. They got over 500 players in this shizzle. And they lost about 100 in the first 3 levels. It's like a turbo but not.
I pick up kings early in level 3 and take some chips from the turtle guy to get up to 15K.
I have to start manufacturing hands to get any chips. I get all of my chips in the middle with AQ on a board or 2 K J 4 against the insane guy. I think I'm bluffing with the best hand because the most I can put him on is a bad flush draw. He folds and I win the 8K pot.
The old scallywag in seat 1 just raised a 750 bet to 8000. Maybe he can't see past his mustache.
In the middle of level 5 the table breaks. Damn. So sad to see it go.
I get moved to table 31 seat 2 and I don't want to do a table draw. Frankly, because all these new peeps are boring and non-descript. Just a bunch of RWGs.
In the 200/400 level I finally pick up aces. I reraise seat 9's 850 bet (WTF is that?) to 2100 and get the big stack in seat 5 and seat 9 to call.
The flop comes 5h 7h 4c. Not a huge fan but when it's checked to me I bet 6K. Big stack folds and seat 9 goes into the tank. He thinks forever so put him on 8s 9s or 10s.
He finally calls and shows 88. Ok, gotta fade 6 or an 8. The turn is a two of hearts. Ick. I dunno if he has a heart or not. It's definitely red though. The river is a harmless deuce and I drag the pot. Now I got some chippies!
A few hands later I bust this Grizzly Adams looking mofo with 99 vs his A8. I get up to around 37K. Woo hoo!
That doesn't last long.
I'm in the small blind when it's folded around to seat 1 who raises to 1500. I call with AT and check the Q high flop. He bets 3K. I call thinking that's he's continuing the semi bluff. The turn is a 9. I check he bets 3K again. Now I know he's on air. I call and the river peels off a K.
After a few seconds of thought I put him all in with a bet of 8K. He calls pretty quick and shows AJ. Kicker plays. WTF was that? How do you call off your stack with AJ?
He says something about being committed. Really? What kind of math is that? K-Mart math?
I'm pretty sure I found the only person in this tournament that would be dumb enough to make that call.
I think even if I put him all in on the turn he's calling. These people...
After the break, I don't even bother counting my chips, we're in the 400/800 level and I'm in the big blind with about 13K in front of me.
It's folded to the idiot in seat 1 and he raises to 2500. Every time it's been folded to him in late position he's raised. He read a book or something about position apparently. I look down at J8 off and make the call. I'm calling that small blind raise about 90% of the time with any two cards. And he can't possibly have another hand. Right?
The flop falls 4 8 J. Sweeeet. He bets 6K. I move in for my last 11K or so. He doesn't snap call this time. He must have not have AJ again. After the dealer does a piss poor job of counting out the chips, he finally calls. I show my two pair and he gasps. I guess he didn't expect me to have a hand. He shows AK.
The turn is a Q, river a T. Giving him the nut straight. GG.
Really? I mean WTF? The guy plays like shit and wins only two hands while I'm at the table. Both from me. I just handed him 40K.
I now understand why people go on shooting sprees. Makes total sense now. This is why I don't own any weapons. I would use them.
I feel so robbed when I walk out of the Venetian. Why can't I just not get over the hump? I just keep getting raped and I keep going back for more. No matter what you do, you're still gonna get prison raped in the shower. There's no escaping it.
I think about going back into the Venetian to stab that guy with a spork but I decide the best course of action would be to find out if he has any kids. If he does, I'm going to take them down to the animal shelter and get them fixed right away. Those genes do not need to be passed down to another generation of idiots. I'll be doing a good deed for society and saving the welfare system some trouble too. I'll be a hero.
Why am I so worked up over a $300 tournament? I don't know. Its ricockulously frustrating to keep losing to horrible players in shitty low stakes tournaments.
I get to look forward to the Caesars freeroll on Sunday, Venetian main event on Monday, and Caesars main event on Tuesday...
Fuck this shit, I quit.
JDN
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