Canada lll

$1000 bound tourney
We got a live one!

Table draw:
Seat 1: JDN
Seat 2: Davidson Matthews (This guy has to be the Canadian Ted Lawson. There's no real reason why he should be able to make a living in poker, but he does.)
Seat 3: Asian Canadian
Seat 4: Scotty Wilson (Scott used to run Paradise poker. Now he's just lazy.)
Seat 5: Asian Canadian
Seat 6: Asian Canadian
Seat 7: Asian Canadian
Seat 8: Canadian

In the first orbit I run my jacks into the set of eights of Scotty Wilson. But I'm pretty sure I lost the minimum when I fold them face up on the turn.

I got it all back in a 3 way pot with Scotty and Mr. Matthews with a board of Q Q 7 2 7. My 9s are goot as Scott declares that he was counterfeited and I'm back to 10k. How the hell was he counterfeited on that river? Huh? I'm confused.

That doesn't last long, after a table break I bust out putting a squeeze play on a couple of retards. Once calls saying he needs to get lucky. Good call goofball and I'm outsky.

Goal of suriving through the 3rd level is crushed.

My girlfriend flies into town and my maturity level jumps at least 4 years above my normal level of that as a 14 year old.

$3k main event
I'm not going to lie. I'm hung over. The tourney starts at a Canadian noon (12:30) and I look over at the clock and its 1:00. Oops. I better buy in.

Table draw:
Seat 1: Asian Canadian
Seat 2: Asian Canadian
Seat 3: old Canadian cowboy with massive banana hands. He's missing a pinkie finger. Never a good sign at a poker table but he can't play lick.
Seat 4: Canadian
Seat 5: French canadian. Totally looks like a mini version Frenchy the lumberjack. Mullet and all.
Seat 6: Canadian
Seat 7: JDN
Seat 8: Canadian
Seat 9: Asian Canadian
Seat 10: Canadian

First break 20k. Started with 15k. Thats all I have in my notes. I was up till 8:30am the night/morning before the tournament and I was not fully coherent. I remember a couple of hands and I made what I believe was a sick call against seat 9.

Under the gun limped for 200 and I called in cut off with A4 off. Seat 9 in the small blind made it 600 to go and the limper and I both called. The flop was Q 2 5. Seat 9 fired out 600 as quickly as possible. Spider sense tingling. Limper folded and I thought a moment before calling. The turn is another deuce and Seat 9 ships it for his last 2500. Hmmmm. Everything smells fishy. KJ maybe. He could definitely do have KJ. Makes sense. I tell him I think he's on complete air and I call. He says good call and turns up K6 off. I show my A4 and the table ohhs and ahhs. River is a 3 for good measure and I rake the pot. The dealer then says, "Wow, he called with a gut shot."

Canadians... I was calling with an Ace dingleberry.

I make another call with Queen high and win. This table is mine. Too bad they break it after I double up two people and am left with 8k. Bah!

I get moved to seat 8 of a table and Devo happens to be in seat 9. Buy me a beer bitch. Booze on its way but the lack of sleep has my hands shaking like a drug addict.

I double up to 15k with 88 on a 3 6 7 board. I get the orginal raiser to call my all in bet. He says that he has a draw and opens up 44. Devo insightfully states that 44 is a draw on a 3 6 7 board in Canada.

I bust on the very next hand with AK vs AA. For added measure the douche bag slow rolls me on the turn.

Fuck this place I'm outta here.

JDN